Friday 4 September 2020

James Shaw Apologises To Rod Donald And Jeanette Fitzsimons - A Parody.

(To the tune of Paul McCartney’s “Uncle Albert – Admiral Halsey”)

 

I’m so sorry, Rod and Jeanette,

I’m so sorry if I caused you any pain.

I’m so sorry, Rod and Jeanette,

But the party that you left me

Is in trouble once again.

 

I’m so sorry, but we’ve hardly done

A thing all term.

I’m so sorry, Rod and Jeanette.

But, Jacinda’s so unhelpful

And Winston always makes me squirm!

 

Sob, sob.

 

So you’re sorry, James? You wanker!

Cos you haven’t done a bloody thing all term?

So you should be, James. You tosser!

There’s a planet on the boil,

And you’re less green than Ardern!

 

Handouts to the wealthy!  (wealthy?)

Handouts to the rich!

Handouts for the crystals  (crystals?)

Buried in a ditch.

 

Taranaki Green School notified me,

They had to have more cash – cos salvation isn’t free.

So I got a grant from Grant, in spite of Treasury, and Chippie (Chris Hipkins)

Who had the gall to call it a strange priority!

 

Handouts to the wealthy!  (wealthy?)

Handouts to the rich!

Handouts for the crystals  (crystals?)

Buried in a ditch.

 

Bugger-off, you ageing hippies – on yer bike!  (on yer bike)

Being green’s a business now,

So you lefties – take a hike!

Bugger-off, you ageing hippies – on yer bike!  (on yer bike)

Being green’s a business now,

So you lefties – take a hike!

 

Handouts to the wealthy!  (wealthy?)

Handouts to the rich!

Handouts for the crystals  (crystals?)

Buried in a ditch!


This parody was originally posted on The Daily Blog of Friday, 4 September 2020.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

That is so good....

greywarbler said...

James might feel like responding with this from Psalm 140:3 King James Version.
Deliver me, O LORD, from the evil man: preserve me from the violent man; 2Which imagine mischiefs in their heart; continually are they gathered together for war.
3They have sharpened their tongues like a serpent; adders' poison is under their lips. Selah.
4Keep me, O LORD, from the hands of the wicked; preserve me from the violent man; who have purposed to overthrow my goings.
5The proud have hid a snare for me, and cords; they have spread a net by the wayside; they have set gins for me. Selah.
6I said unto the LORD, Thou art my God: hear the voice of my supplications, O LORD.

(Selah has indefinite meaning, but seems to place emphasis on the preceding sentence, suggests reflection.)